Rock of Love: The Casting Special

Here's your first chance to catch some of the Rock of Love with Bret Michaels girls in action: below is video footage of the show's casting. The boob-ified clip would make self-proclaimed breast-man Bret proud. Included is one girl's tale of her brush with sex slavery. Another talks about a 10-person orgy she took part in. There's also a PTA member who can make her boobs move independently, and a tatted-up mom who goes into detail about what she calls her "midget fetish." Wild. It's too early to say, but Rock of Love may be embarking on a new frontier of sexual openness.

Rock of Love with Bret Michaels premieres July 15 at 9/8 c on VH1.

Celebrity Fit Club: Men Vs. Women Recap - Episode 8 - Fit To Say Bye

It's the last episode of Celebrity Fit Club: Men Vs. Women, and Dustin has a message for everyone.

Don't you miss him already?

Charm School - Cram Session

As this week's Charm School was a recap episode, there will be no online recap this week, unless someone is interested in recapping our recap. In that case, the magnitude of meta would be so great that we could harness the power to fold space and travel to other galaxies where we'll ride sandworms and consume spice until we're blue in the eyes. Or something.

Anyway, in case you missed this week's episode, the first clip below is a Wicked Short version of the first segment -- the juiciest bit of info comes from (who else?) Saaphyri who reveals what she plans to do with the $50,000 should she win Charm School. We won't give it away, but here's a hint: it's unrealistic.

The next two clips are of footage that didn't make it onto the recap episode. Since the episode focused on the Top 4 (Shay, Saaphyri, Leilene and Becky), we thought the first clip would help in catching you up with all the girls who went before them. It's a montage of the girls' exit interviews -- prepare to break out the Kleenex and/or stifle the guffaws, depending on your capacity for compassion.

The final clip is pretty much all the recap you need: it's a greatest hits clip of sorts of Saaphyri's best commentary. Her pearls of wisdom so numerous, the only way to do them justice would be to transcribe everything she says. Instead we'll just let you watch. Those in the business of making house music, take note: Saaphyri's command of "Walk. Just walk walk bitch. Just walk down the runway, that's all I need her to do," is just dying to be sampled in a bitch track. Somewhere, at some point a drag queen profoundly touched Saaphyri's life and helped shape it. Guarantee it.

Links to Reality

- There's more than one way to get Buckwild – Charm School's Becky hosts a weekly Internet radio show Sundays at 6:30 ET. It is awesome. And we're not just saying that because this week, we're on it. [Blog Talk Radio]

- If you're excited for Rock of Love, you aren't alone – check out this brief clip of a concert audience chanting to show their anticipation. [Bret Michaels' MySpace]

- Celebrity Fit Club's Ant has choice words on Joe Rogan's etiquette. Who does he think he is, Mo'Nique? [TMZ.com]

- Donald Trump is teaming with Fox for a show that provides "a stern course on debutante manners" to wild women. Hmmm...that concept sounds familiar. Where have we heard of it before? [Radar Online]

- When Charm School is over, there will still be plenty of Mo'Nique to go around – her next F.A.T. Chance pageant is set to air July 28 on Oxygen. [ETOnline]

- Just in case you missed it: here's a feature on I Love New York's Tango where he extols the virtues of Jay-Z and My Chemical Romance, alike. Eclectic!

- Ross Matthews is named Hot Slut of the Month on Dlisted. See? Appear on Celebrity Fit Club and all of your dreams come true. [Dlisted]

- Think you know Celebreality? Try out this game and give yourself an ego boost.

Rock of Love: First Look

Rock's about to get a dose of reality...TV. This summer Poison's Bret Michaels will get his Flav on as the ladies pictured above vie for his attention in the Celebreality elimination-based dating show Rock of Love with Bret Michaels. "We knew women vying to date a rock star would make great entertainment but Bret brought outrageousness and excitement to the show that exceeded our wildest expectations,” said show executive producers Mark Cronin and Cris Abrego. “From motorbike wrecks to Vegas rock concerts, it’s a show where you can’t miss a single moment.”

Get the Jäger shots ready -- Rock of Love with Bret Michaels premieres July 15 at 9/8 c on VH1.

Celebrity Fit Club: Men Vs. Women Recap - Episode 7 - On Dirtbikes and Dustin

Quick quiz. Is statement on Dustin's shirt true or false?

The answer is...well, the answer is that Dustin is the star of this show like coughing is the star of tuberculosis.

Charm School Extra Credit - Anatomy Lesson

Hold onto your weaves, because this week's Charm School extras provide a testosterone injection. The first is an extended cut of Saaphyri's showdown with Seashell -- after he makes his crack about large breasts leading to stretch marks, the stacked Saaphyri busts out, "If you have ding-a-lings that are too big, they don't get hard all the way. So which category do you fit in?" Fascinating! In the second Becky talks about her trials and tribulations with men -- apparently, her appearance on Flavor of Love did not attract the kind of men she'd want to date. Can you believe it!?!

Charm School Recap - Episode 8 - Brooke Breaks

If Brooke is, as Mo'Nique says, "the whore of Charm School"...

...does that mean that she could bring some charm to whore school?

She'd be all, "Good sir, stick thy pinky out when caressing the fruit with thy tongue. If you shan't, I shall say good day to you!"

The Celebreality Interview - Kimberley Locke

Kimberley Locke is a diva only by trade -- there wasn't a trace of attitude detectable throughout our 30-minute conversation. It was a pleasure to pick Kimberley's brain about her weight-loss, her new album, Based on a True Story, and, of course, the heckling from Dustin she's endured all season of Celebrity Fit Club: Men Vs. Women. Maybe even more revealing are Kimberley's comments on her gay fans and how she reconciles supporting the gay community with her deep Christian faith. They really don't often make 'em like Kimberley, and that is a damn shame.

Start thinking thin after the jump...

The Fantasy Interview - Larissa

In the past year of working at VH1 and covering its Celebreality slate, there's no one that I wanted to talk to more than Charm School's Larissa. Unlike virtually everyone else who watches the show, I like Larissa -- I don't condone her behavior, but I admire her spunk, her sharp tongue and her commitment to making what those in the business call "good TV." I've talked to and even met her before, but I was really excited about discussing her turn on Charm School, which is either star-making or stomach-turning depending on what you look for in your Celebreality drama.

Imagine my disappointment when, after attempting to contact her for the past two weeks, her manager told me that Larissa was not interested in speaking about her time on the show. Imagine my despair when she chose to dish her dirt to another outlet.

As sad as this makes me, I still love her. She was eliminated from Charm School this week and I really can't let her go without a tribute. Since I couldn't post an interview with her, I did the next best thing: I made one up. Using sound bites from Charm School, I've constructed a completely hypothetical, not at all real conversation between Larissa and I. It's after the jump -- I only wish I could have experienced this level of attitude firsthand.