"I understand that I f***ed up and I understand that I am f***ing crazy," says Irv Gotti in our final installment of our Gotti's Word feature. Below, instead of blocks of commentary, you'll find straight-up Q&A with Irv to tie up all the loose ends of Gotti's Way. Below, you'll find Irv's final thoughts on his situation with Deb and the kids, his relationship philosophy, what it was like to film a reality show and whether divorce with Deb is more of a reality after what went down on his show's season finale.

Reflecting on his show's run, Irv tells us, "It's good therapy to look at yourself and see how stupid you are." Is he right? You be the judge.

You were totally natural on screen. It seems like the cameras didn’t affect you whatsoever.

You know what it is? When I made show, I was like, "F*** it, I’m gonna do it. 'Cause I don’t wanna do anything wack, I don’t wanna do anything corny." It's funny 'cause after the cameras are around you for a few minutes or maybe a half hour, you stop caring. But I don't give a f***, anyway. My whole thing is like this is me and accept me for me. Some people are gonna like it, and some people may not like it, but I can only be me. A lot of the camera men on set would tell me, "We worked on a lot of other reality shows and, yo, we love your show because it’s not scripted."

When you went into it and you were doing all this honestly, what was off-limits, if anything?

The only thing that Deb wanted to be off-limits was she didn’t want me going over-the-top with any chicks. She was like, "I don’t want the kids seeing daddy be a whore." In the scene in the first episode with Russell Simmons, I had on this gold watch with diamonds in it from Jacob. Russell said, "Wow, this is a really f***ing hot watch. Each one of those links could feed an African village, or you could get a lot of p****, whichever direction you want to go in life." Everyone on the set, the crew, everyone was dying laughing. But Deb asked to take that scene out. She was like, "I don’t want the kids seeing you saying you get a lotta p**** or whatever." I thought it was all good.

Did Deb watch every episode?

She watched it all, I watched it all. It's good therapy to look at yourself and see how stupid you are. That’s why I said what I said at the end: the stupidness of Irv Gotti. 'Cause every word that I say is real. I would jump in front of a car for Deb, I would die for Deb. A hundred percent. Like if she needed a kidney, yo, I’d be the first one to cut, like, "Here, here take my s***." But stop f***ing? Forget it.

But does that inconsistency bother you at all? I know that’s just the way it is, but it seems problematic.

It’s a constant battle of will. You want to do the right thing. You say to yourself, "Do the right thing," and then you don’t do it. I wanna do the right thing, but at the same time I don’t wanna f*** up. I feel getting back together with Deb and f***ing up would be worse then what I’m doing now.

I actually admire your practical approach. Someone could stand on a soapbox and have all these principles until they're blue in the face but if he's not working with the situation as it is, then what good are all the principles?

This is what I talk about to everyone when I talk about the show: true happiness. Because only with true happiness with your partner will lessen the chances of you going astray. If you and your partner aren't truly happy, the chances of you going astray are higher. You leave the house and you're like "F*** this nagging bitch," you're gonna f***. Everything has got to be really, really together for you not to do that. Believe me, that’s what men are doing.

But have you ever known that happiness though?

I may be chasing the impossible dream.

Your situation is not perfect, but what is?

When you look inside my relationship with Deb, what you're seeing is six years removed of her kicking me out of the house. If the cameras would have been on when I got kicked out, it would have been a whole different show. It would be hatred. It would be, "F*** you! It would be her telling the kids, "Your daddy’s f***ing bitches!" So when you see her talk to the kids about divorce, I want people to consider the mindset of six years ago when she was saying that to the kids. How the f*** you think that was f***ing with the kids? You’re going to f***ing f*** these boys up by telling them that? But she was so fueled by hate of me, she didn’t give a f***. I’m telling them what’s going on, she would call out the chick’s names that she knew. "He’s f***ing this one, that one." My boys would be looking at her, and Angie’s got her head down like, "Yo, this s*** is just crazy." So what you saw on the show is actually great.

This might be too personal a question, and it’s fine if it is...but do you and Deb ever sleep together?

No.

And you haven’t since...

...not since she kicked me out. Because that would be an even dirtier pool, you know what I'm saying? Like, that is foul. I think we both consciously know that we shouldn’t do that with the state that we’re in. But you wanna hear the funny s***? This is gonna make it even more crazy: we both love children and we both talked about like having another kid. She wants a little girl, I want a girl. Deb's like, "It's better me than you getting one of these chickenhead chicks pregnant." But she’s even said that if I had another kid, she would probably take care of the kid. My mother is dying for more grandchildren, as if she doesn’t have enough. She has 16 because I’m the youngest of eight.

If you did that, the story line of your life would get even more complicated...

If that happened, Deb would say something like, "You can’t have sex with no other girl for a year." I know every woman is looking at me like it’s selfish, but it’s real. All I’m saying is that it’s real. I’m saying the s*** that most men would lie and probably say, "Yeah yeah, all good," to but, yo, I travel a lot. I’m a star now. I’m just an executive, right? I was someone who was sitting behind the scenes. People knew who I was, but it’s different now. Now they want me to do red carpet and s*** like that. Before, I would just walk right past these people and they’d be like, "Oh Irv Gotti, take a picture or whatever." Now it’s like mandatory. It’s like now I’m like a star. I don’t know if I’m cool with that yet.

Now that the show's wrapped, I’m sure people are going to be curious about the fate of you and Deb.

We’ll be in our lives ‘till death do us part.

What about the possible divorce?

We have papers. Attorneys and papers and everything like that.

Since the episode you filed?

No, from before. Before the show started. They're just sitting there. The thing about it is, a divorce would happen if I was to meet somebody, or if Deb met somebody.

Practically speaking, is that gonna happen?

I’m not Miss Cleo, I don’t know. I could walk out of my office and meet somebody and fall deeply in love. Or maybe I won’t. Deb could, the chances of Deb meeting somebody actually now is extremely high.

Because of the show?

Yeah, everyone is like, "Yo, she is beautiful. Guys tell me all the time to give her their number. The chances for her have skyrocketed.

Does the idea of her getting with guys make you jealous?

Maybe a little, but not really. You know what I’m saying? I understand that I f***ed up and I understand that I am f***ing crazy. I understand that I put Deb through a lot of bulls***. If she was to meet somebody, we’ll work through that, too, and I would be 100 percent happy for her. We've talked about it, and if any of us remarry, we’re gonna give each other away. I know that sounds crazy, but I always think of Bruce Willis and Demi Moore. It’s similar to that. Ya know what I’m saying? Bruce Willis on the red carpet with Ashton, Demi and all the kids and he’s standing there. It’s weird. I mean we got these kids. If me and Deb didn’t have no kids, would it be like this? Maybe not. We would probably still be friends and be cordial and everything like that, but would we be that tight? Maybe not. But the kids are growing up seeing Mommy and Daddy and they're cool. And I like that. It may be different but they know Mommy loves me and Daddy loves me and Mommy and Daddy love each other. It’s just Daddy don’t live here.

During your discussion with Deb divorce, you asked the cameras to be turned off. Was it the only time that happened?

The only time.

What about that situation made you feel like you had to do that?

Deb knew exactly what Sonny was gonna do. You see when I have my talk with Sonny at the end, before I even start talking to this boy, I haven’t even said nothing real he’s sitting ready to cry. The boy is emotional and family-driven. You can’t talk to that 10-year-old boy about divorce. All you're gonna get is what you just got: crying. They sat me on the couch and it was a weird day that day. A producer told me, "Irv, we’re gonna talk about a few things." It was a weird vibe. That's why I’m sitting there like, "Yo, what the f*** is going on.?" And that’s when Deb says, "I talked to Sonny about the D-word," and if you see my reaction I said, "Yo, the f*** you do that for?" It's proof positive that Sonny wasn’t ready for this conversation when he gives the answer, "I want my Dad to be my dad forever." He’s equating that if we get a divorce, Dad isn’t my dad anymore.

I thought that was strange.

He’s 10-years-old, he doesn’t know what you're talking about. Rewind to when Deb has that very same conversation with Angie in the Bentley. Angie’s like, "Listen, as long as Dad is still coming around the way he is..." She’s not crying. But Sonny is the one. Because he was like 3-years-old when we were arguing and fighting, I wouldn’t say goodbye to the kids. When Deb first kicked me out, every time I left, Sonny would break down. The minute he saw me getting ready to say, "All right, I gotta.." he just start crying. Deb knows that, that’s why...let me tell you something about women. A women like Deb and women in general, do not think for one second that she won't use that. That’s why I said, "Oh, 'cause Sonny’s crying, I should come the f*** back right?" And then what’s gonna happen? I’m gonna f***, and you're gonna stab me. Sonny’s crying, "Maybe he’ll come back," and I’m like, "Yo, don’t do that. You should know better."

So, what's next for you and VH1? Do you think a second season is inevitable?

There's talk of it. I wonder because the first season was shot in about 15 months. We don’t have that much time to do season 2. Maybe things will change, where they will try to speed up or they will try to put me in situations. My brain is already turning cause I wouldn’t want it to be corny. The last thing I want is for anything to be corny.

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Comments

[Lin]

Gotti you have a good family and I don't understand why you can't see. That what was seen on the show is your lack of appreciation. Tomorrow is not promised to any of us. The celebrity life that you live is not going to make you live forever or Deb live for ever. You loved her enough to marry her have kids with her and that should be more important than the money and fame. You tell your kids to man up. But your not manning up to your role as a husband and showing them how to how to respect a woman. By you respecting their mother. She is you children's mother. She should be more important than just wanting to sleep around for the hell of it. There are people in this world crying for and wishing to have a family. And you what are you doing. I know Deb is not perfect & you are not perfect. But do you really think about what you are doing to your family? Do you really think that having many women make you Gotti? Make you what?

[Cece]

Plz make another season!

[Cece]

ND Yes i APPRECIATE YOUR REAL-NESS! H0WEVER I D0NT UNDASTAND H0W IT TOOK 15 M0NTHS F0R LIKE 7 EPISODES! Wish THERE WAS M0RE F0R I CAN C UR G0RGE0US FACE EVERY M0NDAY NIGHT! IT WAS THE BEST!

[ari122]

I hope Deb moves on with her life.

[vanilla]

i think the show was really good.. however u just have to man up and think about deb's feelings. u would be pissed if deb went out and cheated on u.. she's a really strong woman.. i know i wouldn't wanna be bothered with u.. think about it and tell me if u would want her in ur life if it was turned around????????