After having over five years off...

...it's on!

Welcome to The Salt-N-Pepa Show, the reality half-hour that attempts to blaze a new trail for the hip-hop pioneers. We open on Salt-N-Pepa speaking separately about their estrangement -- it came to a point where Salt wanted out of the group and, in doing so, completely alienated Pepa. Salt has moved on, Pep's still bitter, but for the sake of their dwindling friendship, they're trying to put things back together.

Of course, that just before their first meeting together, we see Salt saying, "Leaving Salt-N-Pepa was the best move I ever made," doesn't really bode well for reunion prospects.

Their manager presents them with an offer: Shaquille O'Neal has requested they perform a song at his birthday party. Immediately, Salt is defensive, saying that she's not so happy with messages they've put out in the past. "I’m not, ‘Push it real good.’ I’m not, ‘You make me wanna shoop and how does your penis hang?’" Straight up, wait up, hold up, because Pepa, apparently, is "how does your penis hang." She says that she's proud of everything they've done, and takes issue with Salt's issues about "Push It." It wasn't about sex to her, but apparently it was to Salt. Who's "how does your penis hang" now? "I thought it was dancin’. I swear on everything I love. People only thought we were saying, ‘P**** real good.’ That’s what the problem was!" That sounds like more of a solution than a problem. And "P**** real good"? Seriously? That sounds like the prequel to the also grammatically unsound "Me So Horny."

Tensions rise...

Basically, Salt has moved on, and Pep feels like she's doing so via the bus that she threw Pep under. The breaks are slammed when Salt mentions that she suffered from severe bulimia and was throwing up five times a day.

Outrage turns to sadness and finally, you can understand Salt's point. Fame can really, to use a tasteless but apt cliché, chew you up and spit you out. If it was affecting her with an eating disorder, she was wise to turn her back on it. But, she's had some time to put her feet on the ground, she's here and she's willing to work with Pep.

Kind of.

Cut to Salt at her prayer group talking about the tough decisions she has ahead of her. For the sake of contrast, we see Pep hanging with her girls...

Pep broaches the controversial subject of the meaning of "Push It" with them, and they all agree that it's a dance song. But not this kind of dance song...

It's probably safe to say that Pep's group does not count as a prayer circle. That's doubly true after Pep tells them of her struggle with Salt: "I'm like bitch..." and then, she embarrassedly corrects herself, "Chick, you owe me this." Her friend encourages her to say "bitch" if she has to. Sometimes you just gotta.  It's like breathing.

Anyway, one of Salt's prayer buddies encourages her to take the gig and reignite her career -- she says that Salt can reach thousands while still holding onto the safe place she needs. Encouraged, Salt calls Pep...

...and they're in! They're going to do the Shaq gig. Pep pledges to do whatever is necessary to ensure that Salt is comfortable in the process. Cut to...

...Salt feeling uncomfortable when Pep brings up the "Push It" thing again. She totally muscles Pep into choosing "Whatta Man" as the song they'll perform at Shaq's b-day. Pep is reduced to whispering: "I like ‘Whatta Man.'" But she probably doesn't like it-like it.

Salt revises a line about her man not being a "wham, bam, thank you ma'am" type, while Pep thinks that the line about him having a "body like Arnold" should be updated. Her choice? "A body like Barack…" Apparently, Pep's into political builds. Fair enough.

Anyway, their rehearsal goes well and look...

...they actually hug! Reunited and it feels so good!

Good and sexy!

Things start falling apart during wardrobe selection...

By the time they're rehearsing with the band, you can practically feel the heat of Sodom and Gomorrah.

You know things are outrageous when your dreadlocked bassist can't handle it...

Salt interrupts Pepa, and Pepa's all, "What am I doing wrong? I'm just grinding my butt into this guy's lap? How could that possibly make you uncomfortable?!?!"

Salt points out in another room that Pep's simulated sex is exactly what she was talking about when she said she needed that zone of comfort.

In other words: try harder Pep! And that "try" is as in "...keeping your head out of dudes' crotches." Pep points out that the guy is wack, anyway. Ah, standards.

After, Salt again brings up the subject...

...and drops a bombshell: the Shaq performance has been canceled. Pep reacts as if Jason Voorhees is responsible for the cancellation.

Seriously, that is a look of axe-wielding terror. Anyway, Salt has a compromise: performing at her church. This way they can get their feet wet...with holy water!

This, too, is not without incident. Pep's original choice of wardrobe is all wrong...

She points out that if she wears this, "the nipple's not gonna show." Uh, any shirt that requires the referencing of a nipple is probably inappropriate for church, Pep. Just a rule of thumb.

Anyway, they perform...

And it goes well! They do a Christ-ified version of "Whatta Man" that includes the line, "He's strong like Samson, knows how to pray." Talk about an update! There's only one instance of Pepa crossing the line...

She goes down a little too far and Salt has to sort of make sure that her bend doesn't get more salacious. To do so, she literally lifts out her hand to support Pep's butt. Ah, friendship.

Comments

[The I to the N]

It was good to see both of them together again, but it seems to be a great deal of tension between them. It's apparent, to me, that Salt has matured and come into her own as a person, while Pepa seems to want to relive the "good old days". They are and were true pioneers in the rap game. There's nothing wrong with wanting to revisit those great times they had as a group. The two of them had a great performance at Salt's church, but may have to cut their losses in order to maintain what friendship they may still have. God bless them both.

[krs]

Its great that they are getting along(so far). If they really wanna become friends I think they need to take it slow. Get to know each other; no judgements passed; be open minded; patient and understanding. Like any relationship it aint gonna be easy its gonna take some work. good luck to them both!!

[lilmama and gg]

salt lift youn uplooked gay

[ANDY SMITH]

I have one comment:
PSALM 139 says "GOD IS EVERYWHERE"
So, if God is everywhere, hes in the bars, arenas, Shaq's party, etc....
I perform everywhere and I have had a so called "spiritual experience"
I wish you both the best in this most impossible business.

[Happy in Conyers]

I was there from the beginning. In New York when they were just getting started. I understand where they are coming from, but I have to say this, Pepa grow up! It is time to mature. Obviously your trying way to hard for attention. Bring it down. You are a parent. Do you really want your child to see you like that?

[Erica]

Hi, I'm a BIG fan of Salt N Pepa. I was raised in the 80's and had all the hair styles of Salt N Pepa. I watched the first episode and was really disappointed. I'm a Christian and I allow my light to shine everyday through my life,words, and actions. I don't push or force it upon anyone. As a Child of God, I want to be a Vessel to everyone that comes within my reach. The reason I said I was disappointed was because of Salt's actions and how it seems as if she was forcing her Faith and Beliefs on Pepa. Salt, you don't have to compromise you Faith, just let Pepa know your boundaries and go from there. Stop dictating everything and holding everything over Pepa's head. You can be an example to her and she just may find Christ because of you, so don't judge her lifestyle or compare it to yours. Salt you do not have to be the Salt from back in the day and you can still keep your Faith and Beliefs and still have clean fun with your sister Pepa. Let her know where you won't go and what you won't do and COMPROMISE not demand. I really didn't enjoy the first episode nor did any of my friends that I called to watch it. I will continue to support the show because I am a big fan, but I pray for fun and happiness.

[Darlena]

I would like to know if salt has an email or support group for women who would like to ask her questions and advise?

[Karen McWilliams]

"Merciless battles between the spirit and the flesh. The field where these two armies meet are my soul."
The Last Temptation of christ
by Nikos Kazan

[Ronda Harris]

Salt, I just wanted to encourage you. I know what it is like when your old life comes back and trying to figure out how to fit it into your new boundries. I grew up on S&P, I had every album, but when I got saved they had to go. I couldn't rock that music anymore. All music is worship and I had to be sure mine was worshipping the most high. I love the way you have redone some of the lyrics. I know when we hit Kareoke it always tempting to do push it, it was my jam, but I know what you are saying about not wanting those words to come out of your mouth. Pep I love ya too girl. Just give Salt a break here and there, and try to see things from her point of view too, and Salt do the same for Pep..

cause at the end of the day it's a JC thang

[sporty]

Pepa doesn't need to grow up. She is full of energy and obviously, not ready to move on to "maturity". She needs to get all that energy out and she should. Why don't Pepa get someone else to do Salt's part? Put a group together. Her career did end prematurely(thks 2 Salt). Pepa had alot more game and herslf to give to her fans. It's sad to see Pepa compromising herself for the sake of Salt. Pepa, you have my support. I hate to see you wasting your time "begging" Salt for a 2nd chance of stardom. Stop acting like Salt got your life in her hands and rules it.

[Lakoya]

I luv the salt n pepa show if i havn't watched it ten times already i havn't watched it once....i jus wanna say that i luv salt n pep n i luv wat salt hav dun by putting god in her life n i jus feel like she shud giv pep a break once she hav set her boundries she can stil be in a group n stil hav jesus with her... pep also need 2 understand a little more about where salt is cumn from n try 2 make it a lil more comfortable for her....not that she isnt already trying hard to do that....but in the end i hope that salt n pepa can b a group again n i hope that their friendship can b stronger that eva n i hope that pep decides to put jesus in her life 2....me myself is working on that and because of salt im even more inspired that i can do it and succeed...

[Geraldine]

I'ts funny because your song Independant got me threw my first divorce. Their is no in between with Christianity and what christians call..The World. No man can serve two masters. I agree with the other comments stay friends but as a group I think that road came to a splite and your chose your paths. Pep well you didn't have a choice. The reason for the depature was given I think right their is the end of the rest of your episodes cause Salt is not going to as she feel betray God and Pepa is not even in a place to understand. BUt I LOVE YOU BOTH !! and I have ya whole collections so personally I never worried if you was coming o gether or not cause I have you all the time !! :0)

[A. Mosi]

Dear Pepa, have you ever thought about going solo, I'm talking about for the very first time in your life & career, make your very first solo album, cause it's crystal clean, salt does not wanna go back to her old ways, hell salt doesn't even wanna work with you anymore.

[Nicole Settles]

Salt your friend pepper has so much pain in her.God is telling you not to judge her to your standerts but to walk her with spirt,pepper has a lot of scares and wounds in her.The people she is befriending are all bad souls draining her. god bless you both

[Maria]

Sister Cheryl(Salt)...wow!born again!!I respect your convictions and truly see how much you love the Lord and how greatful you must be.Remember that the Lord sat and ate with the worst sinners in that city.He has placed alot of his kids as singers, actors/resses, producers,and writers into a non christian world..."Be well balanced.."

[Maria]

Pepa(Sandra):You continue to be an awesome performer!I know there are things that you hear Salt say that don't make any sense,but don't be in a rush to cast them aside too quickly...who is this Jesus?God Bless.

[Maria]

Pepa(Sandra):You continue to be an awesome performer!I know there are things that you hear Salt say that don't make any sense,but don't be in a rush to cast them aside too quickly...who is this Jesus?God Bless.

[u had ur chance.]

Pep should have foxy on I'm sure this was tapped a minute ago...

[Jay morgan]

Its hard living in two worlds, Salt I wish you the best sista
because the secular world is to easy to re-enter.

[Sadee']

I really think you guys have come a long way. Also, it's possible for you ladies to go on tour and dismiss all of the other problems. Let the past be the past, and make history all over again! Pull in some of these young ladies who are out here struggling with everyday life, and give them some advice that is greatly needed. I'm only saying, give them what you gave me. A clear mind so that females can understand that they too have a voice.

[Tee C]

I honestly have to say I didn't enjoy the first show. I was happy to see the 2 try and talk things out and express their feelings, but Salt is trying way to hard to force her faith on Pepa. I to am saved, living for the Lord and keep Him at the head of everything I do. I also have balance in my life. Salt does not have to scold Pepa and demean her on her every action. Just let your light shine and ask God to word your mouth and guide your footsteps with your friend. Pepa does seem stuck right were the group left off and clearly still has alot of partying and performing left in her. If there is a way to compromise for both young ladies without Cheryl AKA (Salt) constantly shutting Pepa down on her every action the show would be much more enjoyable. God Bless...

[pam]

I enjoyed the first episode, however as a clincal therapist and a Christian i was quite disturbed at the level of control and judgement that Salt constantly subjected Pepa to.Christ tells us to "come as u are" and he also was drawn to those who were lost and rejected by society. Salt your approach to Pepa would draw anyone who is searching AWAY from Christ. I would advise you to seek help for your control issues and seek to embrace your friend for who she is and not who you think she should be; and then she will be more likely to embrace Christ, if she hasn't already. U never know who has given their life to Christ but only needs to understand how to have a relationship with him. All of us have a past and the Word says "our righteousness is like filthy rags." I hope the two of u can renew your frienship without need to control and without judgement.

[Dionne]

I enjoyed the first episode, it was enlightening on the two personal relationship that so many women encounter with lifetime friends. Salt and Peppa you must accept eachother for who each of you have become. Salt, you have been a bit rough on Pep though. The judging of her is a bit much, if you want her to receive Christ as you have just be you and she will if that is what she wants. I realize that being saved now for Salt may be hard to perform the old lyrics; however,growing up on S&P has provided me with the voice to say what I want when I want and not be embarrassed as a woman. The power that the both of you possess to encourage women to be strong is awesome! Keep it going ladies and I hope you will be able to rekindle a relationship based on respect and love.

[JadeFan]

Where the hell is Spinderella?